Are you ready for some Query Kombat? If you haven't heard of this, check out #QueryKombat or these blogs of our wonderful hosts:
Michelle4Laughs, Writer's OutWorld, and SCWrite.

I made it into Round 1 as alternate when someone had to back out, so I'm a long shot for sure because these are some wonderful entries!

Round 1 is complete - and if I counted right - I made it through to round 2. My entry, along with my Kombatant Wishwell is here. So much wonderful feedback from the judges and other Kombatants.

I've made massive changes to my query and first 250 - which are posted below. I'd love some feedback. Better? Still needs work?

Kombat name: Interstellar Pez
Title: MIGHTY MIKE AND THE ALIEN PEZ DISPENSER
Genre: MG Sci-fi/Adventure
Word count: 43k

Query:
Eleven-year-old Mike daydreams of becoming superhero Mighty Mike, but all that gets him is top billing on The List of Chumps to be Pounded after School.

His love for all things science and science fiction lands him in the middle of a Federal investigation when a badly dressed, blue creature invades his favorite hiding spot and begs for help researching human reactions to alien environments. Candies from a shiny red dispenser will test Mike’s responses to extraterrestrial conditions by triggering temporary super (and not-so-super) powers. Mike figures he’ll be able to blast his name off The List forever.

Speed, strength, and invisibility—awesome. Frog legs and belching zoo-animal noises, not so spectacular. But if Mike wants to become a real hero, he will have to save his friends—and worst enemy—from Feds who aren’t what they seem and a four-armed, snout-faced alien wielding the Interstellar Remote Control of Everything.

First 250:

Mike stuffed his spaceship doodled notes and yesterday’s quiz with a large “A++”  into his backpack. The zipper shredded the pages, but he flung the half-closed pack over his shoulder and sprinted from the classroom before the bell finished ringing. He burst through the front doors as the halls filled with fifth and sixth graders. The yellow backpack thudded against his back as he dashed toward the community park.

 Chest heaving, Mike slipped into the woods. He skidded down a bank covered with last year’s leaves and plunked onto a half-rotted log behind a massive oak tree. Dirt clods splashed into a puddle.

 Mike stared at the ripples. Hiding like a wimp sucked, but it was safer than being found by Brutus and his gang. The husky sixth-grader was the keeper of The List of Chumps to Be Pounded After School. Mike wasn’t the only target, but some days it felt like his entry was permanent. The List wasn’t limited to boys or kids either. Girls with glasses, the crossing guard, the town drunk—many felt Brutus’s twisted idea of fun. Mike’s offense was being too smart.

After the science teacher referred to him as the next Einstein, Brutus chanted Afro-Einstein for weeks. Which totally baffled Mike since his close-cropped hair didn’t look anything like Einstein’s wild tufts.

The puddle stilled into a mirror. A shadow loomed over Mike’s watery reflection. He leapt to his feet—right into the puddle—ready to sling his backpack into Brutus’ head.

Except it wasn’t Brutus.

 

Click here for my "The Writer's Voice" entry

 

And now to today's main event...

Welcome to a CYOA blog hop to celebrate the release of Eliza Tilton's YA Fantasy, Broken Forest!

 

If you’ve landed here during your adventure, skip to "Your story continues" below. At the bottom are two Rafflecopter giveaways.

If you’re wondering what’s going on, go here to start your own adventure!

And may The Creator bless you on your journey.

Your story continues:

Lena is right. You decide to head north. You can play after you find the flower.

Howls sound behind you, this time closer. The winter wolves hunt in packs, large white nightmares that can rip a bear in two.

“They shouldn’t be this close to us,” you say. It’s then you notice the red line across Lena’s arm.

Blood.

“Lena, your arm!” You rip off a piece of your tunic and tie it around her arm.

“It must have happened when I fell.”

The wolves can smell blood from a great distance, and once they are locked onto the scent, there’s no escaping them.

You pull out your sword and prepare for an attack. There’s no running, and the tree branches are too high to climb. Lena stands beside you, bow ready.

A pair of sickly yellow eyes peer at you from the dark.

“Prepare yourself,” you say.

She nods, and notches an arrow.

Two wolves spring at you. Lena shoots hers down and you struggle against yours as the blade hacks against its furry skin.

Three more wolves appear.

“Ahh!” You swing your sword in an arc, killing the nearest wolf, then swivel your foot to face the one on your right.

Roole is already there, slamming his gargantuan mace at the wolf. He’s the largest and strongest of your companions, and he is a welcome sight.

“Thank The Creator,” Lena says, a little breathless.

“I saw you two pass the stream.” Roole wipes his mace on the grass, cleaning off the wolf’s blood.

With no more wolves, you can safely search the area. The stream connects to a small pool that funnels under the rock and along the edge of the pool, are bunches of black flowers.

Lena grasps your arm, pointing. “Look!”

While you don’t want to share the discovery, it’s the right thing to do for the village, and Roole did help save you from a pack of wolves. Now you can bring home the healing nectar to your family.

But there is that Jenzi business.

You take Lena in your arms, kissing her. Her hands wrap around your neck, and with your free hand, you snatch your pouch. Before she can realize her mistake, you’ve tagged her.

Roole looks up from the flower he’s collecting to see you splashing red across his tunic and he doesn’t look happy.


END
Buy Broken Forest Here or
B&N or
Kobo or
Amazon  
Book goodreads blurb:
http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17797991-broken-forest
Hopeless he'll never be more than the boy who didn't save his brother, 17-year-old Avikar accepts his life as the family stable boy, trying to forget the past. But when his sister, Jeslyn, is kidnapped, the thought of losing another sibling catapults him on a desperate quest. With his best friend by his side, and using the tracking skills he learned from his father, he discovers Jeslyn has been taken, kidnapped by one Lucino, the young lord of Daath, a mystical place thought only to exist in fables.

And Lucino has plans for Jeslyn.

Author BIO:

Eliza graduated from Dowling College with a BS in Visual Communications. When she’s not arguing with excel at her day job, or playing Dragon Age 2, again, she’s writing. Her stories hold a bit of the fantastical and there’s always a romance. She resides on Long Island with her husband, two kids and one very snuggly pit bull.

Author links:Twitter https://twitter.com/ElizaTilton
Tumblr http://elizatilton.tumblr.com/
Website http://www.elizatilton.com
Pinterest http://pinterest.com/elizatilton/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Eliza-Tilton-YA-Author/245765852217133


Enter the main Rafflecopter giveaway, plus one for this segment of the adventure!

a Rafflecopter giveaway a Rafflecopter giveaway

A weekend of writing and riding

Wow, I don't think it could have been possible to stuff more into this past weekend. The third weekend in April has always been about choice in the past because two events are scheduled at the same time - the annual Pikes Peak Writer's Conference and my first endurance event of the season.

This year, the Kenlyn endurance ride was scheduled for Sunday instead of Saturday, so I was able to attend Thurs-Sat at the writing conference (sadly missed the award banquet and keynote speaker Libba Bray :-( and Sunday sessions.)

I attended great sessions on query writing, first page impacts, author panels, world building, writing for boys and much more. I pitched to Barry Goldblatt who passed on some cold honest truths - in his experience. I'm not daunted, my current book with a working title of MIGHTY MIKE AND THE ALIEN PEZ DISPENSER will be right for someone and some boy out there will read it, enjoy it, and just maybe, think reading is a cool thing to do. I met another great agent that just might be the one and learned about a publisher that could be perfect for my book. If only they didn't only accept un-agented submissions once a year. In December. Patience is not a virtue in my world!

And after all this cerebral fun, hubby and I loaded up our horses which haven't had nearly enough conditioning in this bizarre spring weather, drove to Denver and rode 50 miles through some very interesting urban settings. Ok, not quite 50 miles riding. Our poor bodies (also sadly lacking in the spring riding conditioning department) demanded that we get off and lead a few times. Just to save our horses from our sad riding posture as much as to stretch some muscles. The horses did great and we completed in 3rd and 4th place.

On a sort of separate note, but still related to both experiences: events of the last couple weeks have left me feeling jaded and saddened about the condition of the world. I truly felt there was no hope for children to have the kind of childhood I enjoyed. But seeing all the wonderful books being written that will bring comfort, hope, challenge, and salvation to future readers reminds me not everything has changed. And during our endurance ride, we ran into many youngsters out walking, biking and exploring that were so thrilled to see our horses. The world is still exciting and fun. We all have to work to keep it that way to make sure our children have options to choose between escaping into the wonderful world in a book or experiencing nature. Or finding ways to include both.

My friend and critique partner, Eliza Tilton, will have her first book published in May 2013. It's a YA Fantasy titled Broken Forest, and her very talented husband did the cover art.

To kick this release off, YA Romantics is hosting a CYOA Blog Hop set in the Broken Forest world. One of the scenes will be hosted here, but look for a post with the starting point and enjoy creating your own adventure set in this imaginative world.

Pitch Madness

No posts for three months and now two in one day! I also entered Brenda Drakes Pitch Madness. To follow, check out #PitchMadness on twitter. She has an amazing line up of support and agents who will eventually see the best entries.

Here's my 35 word pitch and 250 word first page:

Title: MIGHTY MIKE AND THE ALIEN PEZ DISPENSER
Genre: Middlegrade Sci-fi/Adventure
Word Count:42k

Pitch: Dedicated to all things science fiction, eleven-year-old Mike tests superpower infused alien candies in hopes of escaping bullies. He ends up in a remote control versus laser battle to save his friends—and worst enemy.

Excerpt:

Mike crept toward the swings, one eye on Brutus, the keeper of The List of Kids to Be Pounded After School. Brutus and his two cohorts leaped and hollered on the basketball court, absorbed in the bloodiest game of basketball ever. So far, they focused on bruising themselves instead of their usual targets at Grover Cleveland Middle School. Mike peeked through the monkey bars. Still safe.

The List wasn’t a physical list, of course. It lived in the head of Nathan Simms, the biggest kid in sixth grade. Failing to call Nathan by his self-chosen nickname of Brutus guaranteed an entry on The List. Even the teachers found it easier to call him Brutus.

Mike didn’t know how he’d landed a permanent entry on The List. He wasn’t ugly, poor or stupid. Brutus didn’t say a word when Jordan—the most popular sixth grader, with skin the same coffee-color as Mike’s—spewed milk from his nose. Instead of calling Jordan booger-breath, Brutus tagged Mike with a humongous, drippy spitwad.

No one picked on Mike’s best friend Carlos either. But then Carlos was always picked first for team sports and had two older brothers. Big older brothers.

Dashing from the monkey bars to the merry-go-round, Mike stubbed his toe on a bump and nearly face-planted in the gravel. He scrambled to his feet and tried to walk casually. His eyes flicked back and forth from the uneven ground to Brutus snatching the basketball from his second-in-command Cole. Cole retaliated by elbowing his buddy in the chest.

My 2011 NaNoWriMo project is done!

It's been a while since I posted. Back in January, I thought we were about 10 days from closing on an awesome property we found in Cedar City Utah. Great house, next to BLM, a basement apartment for my mom. We'd need to do some fencing and build a barn, but it was perfect for us because it is so close to a lot of the endurance rides we want to do.

But, the property was off the grid. And after swearing that was no problem, the bank suddenly said, oh, you mean there's no electricity? Well, we can't loan on that.

We flailed around with a couple more banks, even tried one that would let us finance running electricity for a mile to the place, but that failed as well.

Since then we've been living out of boxes since we'd packed everything but the essentials. And we have to move since we've sold our current property. Luckily the buyers are able to be flexible.

A CP and friend of mine, Eliza Tilton, soon to be published with the project that we first met over, challenged me to finish a book I'd started for the 2011 NaNoWriMo. She figured we could finish our WIP's in time for WriteOnCon in March.

I was 20k in, expecting it to end around 40k. So I knew it was possible. I averaged 1000 wpd most weekdays and got it finished on Feb 28.

Throughout Feb, Eliza and my in person CP read the pages and I felt it was a pretty clean ms. So I decided to submit to a couple contests and get more feedback.

I entered the Operation Awesome Secret Agent. The secret agent is Tricia Lawrence of the Erin Murphy Literary Agency and I won! She wants to see the full!!!! I'd checked out this agency in the past because Ami-Joan Paquette read a few chapters of my currently shelved YA Fantasy. This is very exciting because not only do I think they're a great agency, but they don't accept unsolicited queries. Awesome opportunity!

I still haven't moved (but getting closer - we found a 62 acre property in Colorado with a log home that needs lots of work, cuz yeah, I need more projects!)

What's the right/write solution?

I just finished working with a young horse that had issues being ridden away from home. She was a pleasure to work with, good mind and really very brave. Her issues weren't separation anxiety or even leaving the comfort of home. It was more that it gets boring doing the same thing over and over. A smart horse starts thinking that if they have to do it over and over, they must be doing something wrong and starts looking for alternatives.

All it really took was changing her bridle to something that wouldn't encourage her to rear, good timing to keep her pointed the right way and to keep things interesting and rewarding (yummy, dry weeds) out on the trail.

Every horse needs a different approach. If a trainer says they have a sure-fire recipe or that they won't let a horse advance until they are perfect at something else, s/he isn't really listening to the horse.

Just like giving the same cue to 100 writers--they will all come up with a completely different story, all valid, all interesting. Everyone has a different approach to writing, editing and marketing. None right or wrong, except for the individual. We must all keep our minds open to find what works for us.